Zongliranje licnostima / Juggling personalities

Oko posmatraca, cetvrti post:

Ko sam ja? “Bloger Djoksa”? Da li vec u sledecem trenutku postajem “ortak Djoksa” ili mozda “decko Djoksa”? Trudim se da sve “verzije” mene budu ista osoba. Nesto sto, koliko vidim u ljudima oko sebe, vecini ne polazi za rukom. Koliko stvarno ljudima uspeva da sacuvaju svoje “ja” u ovoj igri prilagodjavanja situacijama i skrivanja pod maskama? Mislim da kljuc uspesnosti u bilo cemu ne zavisi toliko od toga kakvu sliku uspemo da stvorimo o sebi, vec od toga koliko u svakoj “veziji” nas stvarno ima – nas.

Poslednjih dana posmatram ljude i situacije. Razlicite situacije u kojima isti ljudi postaju razliciti ljudi. To nije adaptacija. To nije druga strana iste licnosti. To je samo licemerje. Ti ljudi su licemeri. Ljudi bez integriteta, stavova, misljenja i slobodne volje. Ljigavi individualci koji klimaju glavom i slazu se sa svime sto sagovornik iznese pred njih. Mozda bas vasi najbolji prijatelji, bar dok ste okrenuti ka njima. Dno dna socijale dzungle.

Koliko god da ih prezirem, jednu stvar izvlacim kao pouku iz ponasanja licemera. Sve delove svoje licnosti, koliko je god to moguce, pokusavam sto vise da uklopim u jednu personu. U razlicitim situacijama koristim razlicite strane svoje licnosti, ali ostajem ista osoba. Ne postoji “Bloger Djoksa” ni “ortak Djoksa” ni “decko Djoksa”. Postoji samo Djoksa. Zongliram svojim osobinama, nikad licnostima.

I na kraju, predpostavljajuci da niste licemer, ostaje samo pitanje koliko ste sebe spremni da otkrijete nekome.

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Eye of the beholder, post four:

Who am I? “Djoksa the blogger”? Do I become “Djoksa the friend” or maybe “Djoksa the boyfriend” the next moment? I try to fit in every “version” of me into the same person. Something that, at least judging by those around me, most people don’t do. How much of their inner self can people save in this game of adjusting to different sitations and hiding under masks? I don’t think being succesfull in anything depends that much on what image we create about our selves, it’s more how much of us is really in every “version” of us.

Last few days I’ve been watching people and situations. Different situations in which the same people become different people. That’s not an adaptation. That’s not a different side of a same personality. That’s just hypocrisy. Those people are hypocrites. People with no integrity, no opinions and no free will. Slimey individuals who nod their heads at anything that another person brings up in a conversation. Maybe your best friends, at least while you’re facing them. The very bottom of the social jungle.

As much as I despise hypocrits, theres one thing that I can learn from their behavior. I try, as much as I can, to combine all the different parts of my personality into this one person. I use different sides of that one personality in different sitations, and yet remain the same person. There is no “Djoksa the blogger” or “Djoksa the friend” or “Djoksa the boyfriend”. Theres only Djoksa. I juggle my features, never personalities.

And finally, assuming youre not a hypocrite, the only question is how much of your personality are you willing to reveal to someone.